Resetting normal

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately (surprised? then you don't normally read this blog...)
About life, balance, triathlon, goals, what it means to be an athlete and how to do all the things we want to do in life. I think this is even harder for females than it is for males- throw childbearing and being a mother into the equation of life, work, marriage, friends, spirituality.... well, it just seems like an unfair standard to both have to balance a succesful career AND raise a family. Throw into the mix our need for self fulfillment via sport and now things get even hairier.... but I digress
I've been thinking about offseason. We all get so excited about it but we all hate it after a few weeks as goals and dreams of the next season filter into our minds. Then there are those of us who are maybe contemplating a transition from the ironman world. It feels a little odd to be so casually walking away from ironman when it seems the whole world is now aspiring to enter the sport (hyperbole. yes, I know). It just seems like something about the soul of the sport gets lost in its seemingly ever present popularity. Call me a snob, but I liked it when triathlon was a fringe sport. When things tend to get overly popularized I tend to become more and more disinterested in them so I guess I'm an elitist in all aspects of life.
When you walk away from the heavy handed structure and single minded focus that is the ironman life, you have to reset normal. I don't know if I realized it, but I guess this is what I have been going through since Kona. Initially post race, you want another race on the horizon just to maintain homeostatis of body, mind and schedule. As the weeks wore on from Kona, I slowly felt my mind release from the death grip of feeling like I HAD to race. I let go of the addiction and with every day I'm finding that not only is it ok to not have a race on the horizon, its actually pretty awesome.
My mind is so much more open to new experiences, I'm relaxed and more stress tolerant to life's annoyances and I feel rested for the first time in years. If I have a little extra unexpected time in my day, I'm not racing home to try and catch up on 20 minutes extra sleep and I'm not dragging myself around in a haze of self induced exhaustion. I feel healthy and that's an awesome feeling.
I started thanksgiving day with an little interval run mixed with lunges, push ups and squats- my little homemade crossfit work out pre-Thanksgiving dinner. I did it because I wanted to get some energy out but some part of me did it out of habit too. After that, I spent the rest of the 4 days off doing nothing at all. I hung out with my inlaws, watched a million movies and football games, decorated for Christmas with the family. I barely left the house and the most energetic thing I did for each day was shower. I had no idea how badly I needed that. I felt like a new person after this weekend. I haven't had this much energy in years.
Suddenly this morning I realized that I had done it, I had reset normal. Its now normal for me to get up and walk the dog on the beach in the morning, or to go to masters' just for a social workout of no more than 2500 meters, or sleep in because I want to. Its normal for me to go to crossfit every night and love it. Its normal to wake up and do things differently than I used to. And now that that is normal, I don't feel as anxious about not racing for the forseeable future. I like it this way right now and I'm finally ok with that :)